Struggling With Personal Style Identity!

7th April 2019

Hey everyone!

I know this sounds like a pretty odd name for a post title as I think a lot of people have a signature style that they stick with. Trends come and go but you have your staple pieces, you have your staple outfits, look and style, whether that be bright and colourful, dark and daring or anything in-between. You know what you like and you know what you’d never be seen dead in.

“The Rules”

Firstly, one thing that I think should be abolished in fashion is the rulebook of whether something ‘suits’ you. You shouldn’t wear this shaped dress if you’re curvy or you shouldn’t wear low cut tops if you’re at either end of the boob size spectrum. You shouldn’t wear this colour if you’re blonde or this colour if you’re dark. You shouldn’t wear this kind of trouser if you’re short and you shouldn’t wear a certain heel height if you’re tall. I mean, WHY shouldn’t you? I always think fashion is SUCH an individual thing and if you feel good in something, whether some stupid rule tells you that it’s ‘not for you’ or not, you should wear it and rock it. 

I think one thing that people often forget is that a lot of the success of a look comes from the person who’s wearing its confidence. This is why I no longer wear anything that I feel is a bit too tight, a bit too short or just doesn’t look great as I spend the whole time feeling embarrassed, resulting in me consistently adjusting or hiding my outfit. Buy and wear things that YOU think look good on you, not what someone else says you’re supposed to wear.

Personal Style Identity

For me, my style, my fashion and my appearance are a huge part of my identity. To a certain extent, I think that sounds quite vain but I use my appearance as a form of self-expression. Everything from my hair colour to my makeup to my tattoos to the chunky shoes I wear on my feet, pairing and wearing it is an art form in my opinion. Although I am a firm believer that confidence comes from the inside, mine is definitely at its best when I think I look good on the outside. 

I guess the thing I’m struggling with currently, is what I actually want to say or portray with my appearance. It says a lot about a person and now I’m getting a bit older, I find myself simultaneously caring more and less about how I look. For example, despite being a huge beauty lover, I probably only wear makeup about once a week now. One of the main reasons being my skin has completely changed and tends to get really dry if I wear it too much. Another being that I no longer feel like I NEED to wear makeup to look nice. I do like to make sure I’m usually always wearing a nice outfit now though, if you catch me wearing something scraggly, chances are I’m really not feeling well that day.

However, back in my college days I used to force myself to get up an hour early to apply makeup every single day but would go around wearing clothes that looked like I’d just picked them out of a bin (emo life). It’s not that I’ve lost interest in beauty as I have a LOT more experience and interest in it now. I never even used to have a moisturiser back then, let alone a 5 step skincare routine. I’m 10 times better at applying makeup now and my product collection has also grown from a makeup bag to a set of drawers and a vanity case full. 

One thing I do have to say has stayed consistent is my love for Adexe watches! They’ve just released their Miniature Sistine collection and it is BEYOND gorgeous. It’s especially brilliant for those that want a dainty and feminine but luxury accessory with a decent price point, starting from £79. I’m wearing the Mini Sistine Rose Gold and Black style here and it looks absolutely fabulous if I do say so myself! You can get 15% off of your purchase with Adexe by using the code BLACKTULIP15. I also think it goes so gorgeously next to this cute little rose gold bar bracelet from Inefabless which reads “I love you to the moon and back”.

So Why Am I Struggling With My Style Identity?

I think a big part of it is the fact that my tastes have really changed over the past year or two and I feel like I’m not sure where exactly I fit anymore. Ever since I was around 12 I’ve strayed from the path with who I am. Because I was idolising rock stars instead of pop stars, I wanted to dress like them instead which resulted in me sticking to dark colours and oversized clothes all the time. I remember it even got to the point that I THREW OUT my Blink-182 tour t-shirt because it was red and I didn’t want to wear anything that wasn’t black. Yes, I really regret it now because I loved that shirt and it holds great memories.

I always sort of stuck to that style and if I’m completely honest, I’ve always been really insecure about my weight so wearing black all the time was so much easier for me as it never accentuated anything I didn’t want it to. I’d probably say my tastes started to change about 2 years back, I began to buy more patterned and colourful clothes and wearing them alongside other black items and Dr Martens to still punk them up a bit.

I’m not entirely sure how or why it’s happened but my wardrobe has gone from being black, grey and red to being every colour and pattern you could probably imagine in one place. It’s gone from black skinny jeans and band tshirts to flowy leopard print midi skirts, rainbow striped culottes and embroidered heart jumpers. I still have some really lovely punky pieces that I wear regularly and I like to think even when I do wear some more girly pieces, I style them a bit differently to make them more “me”. 

Style Identity Pressure As A Blogger

Despite currently being really confused about my style identity, I’ve found that I’m actually so much happier wearing funkier clothes. I love pairing up clashing prints and colours that aren’t meant to go together but just weirdly do. I think there’s more pressure as a blogger to have a ‘signature style’ or a consistent theme that doesn’t waiver as its usually what your followers/readers want to see. 

Saying that, my style has changed massively over the time I’ve been blogging and despite definitely losing a few people along the way, I’ve gained a lot more that I think actually appreciate the inconsistency as it’s sort of a surprise and you’re never quite sure what to expect from me.

Close up Adexe watch // style identity

I guess my next step in this journey is accepting that I don’t fit under a heading or into a box anymore which is a really good thing. I love being individual and I love being unapologetically me!

Do you have a consistent personal style identity or just go with the flow with your fashion choices?

’Til Next Time,


*This post contains gifted items for the purpose of promotion but all views are my own.

13 responses to “Struggling With Personal Style Identity!”

  1. I adore the individuality of your style Alice, it’s so quirky and pretty! I wear such different clothes every different day that i really dont have any style identity at all but that doesnt stop me wearing whatever the hell i want!x

  2. Lozza says:

    This is such an interesting read! I’ve always had a grungey kind of style but felt pressured when I was younger to be more girly and now my style is a mix of the two. I just dress how I feel each day, some days may be pink or colourful and others I’m all for the all black look with my leather jacket and black skinny ripped jeans! 😊

    Love Lozza xo

  3. glowsteady says:

    So interesting. I can totally relate to what you said about caring less and more about appearance as you get older. I’m always more confident when I like what’s going on on the outside too. I’m really lucky that I found a really strong sense of personal style when I was younger and it never really changed much x


  4. CarlyBloggs says:

    You always look fabulous no matter what you’re wearing! My style is so boring but I’m comfortable so that’s all that matters. Just keep being you!

  5. I agree that rules should go out the window when it comes to fashion. If you love something wear it! Your outfits are amazing and I love that watch! It’s so dainty and pretty!

  6. Cee Arr @ Dora Reads says:

    I don’t have ‘a’ style – I wear what I wanna wear when I wanna wear it. I usually go for something that’s fairly comfortable, because what’s the point of looking good if there’s a zip poking in somewhere, or the fabric is itchy?

    Being a book blogger means that I don’t have any pressure to be stylish – one of the perks of being in a niche that’s focussed more on words and character! I’m not saying there *aren’t* style pressures within the book-blogging community (which, y’know, I ignore b/c I don’t have time for that sh**!) but they actually tend to be more focussed on what props are in your pics, or what cover-edition of the hyped book you have.

    I do remember a non-uniform day in school where I wore a big red sports jumper (a hand-me-down from my brother – I loved that jumper,) and a pair of joggers when I was about 13. I was feelin’ the butch side of my personality (though I wouldn’t’ve even *known* to call it that at the time,) and honestly, in my naivety, I didn’t think it would be a problem. The systematic verbal abuse of that day (plus, I think there might’ve even been some shoving… I have vague memories of people pushing me…) meant that I never wore that kind of thing in public ever again. Which is sad, really. Cisheteronormativity is a bi***.

    Ha, I kind of went off on one there… I think my point (if I had one!) was we need to be more accepting of people as they are. Boxes are for moving books around, not for putting people in 😉

  7. Love this post. I always struggle with clothes – you’ll find me in a tshirt and jeans at most day-to-day, even if my makeup looks awesome haha! I won a watch from ADEXE at Christmas and I love it to bits! xx

  8. Wearing anything with confidence shines through awesomely. This is how celebs pull off some wacky looking outfits. Excellent tips here.

  9. Karalee says:

    After college I went through a similar change in style. I ALWAYS wore black, but now I have more colorful clothing (I still a good amount of black but a lot have floral prints) & I have expanded into wearing playsuits, maxi dresses & sweaters.
    I don’t really know what to call my style, but it’s just “me” & it makes me feel good when I wear my clothes!

    Tales of Belle

  10. Kim says:

    I think confidence is so important when it comes to clothes. My style has definitely changed over the years – there was a period where I would only wear black too. Now I wear a mix of prints, dark colours and you’ll often find me in jeans and a t-shirt. I never used to wear jeans, opting for ‘cargo pants’.

  11. Tiffany says:

    I’ve never like the rules of fashion that I actually heard of, like short heavier girls shouldn’t wear horizontal stripes. When I love horizontal stripes and I will forever wear them. I think personal style changes for most people over time, like I graduated in ’05 and I think that I went from hobo in high school, to plain-ish no style in the navy, and now I’m just a legging and t-shirt kind of girl. Which isn’t a big change but from someone who didn’t brush her hair in high school it’s a big step up.

  12. I’m definitely a go with the flow kind of gal, for example I’m a bit preppy today with white trainers, blue jeans and a preppy navy blue jumper. But at the weekend I had a pair of black Docs, leopard print skirt, black tee and biker jacket – there’s never an inbetween! I always love your style and the mystery of what’s to come next! 😘❤️❤️

  13. I’m literally so go with the flow with my style, I think I just tend to wear what’s most comfortable to be honest. I love culottes and jumpsuits the most as I feel like they’re what flatters my figure the most. I would LOVE to get more experimental with my style as I always think you look super cool and I would love to be as cool as you hehe. That Adexe watch is gorgeous, I remember seeing they had a baby pink one a while ago and I’ve been longing after it ever since. The one thing I have tried to be more brave with is colour, I was like you and literally only used to wear black but I’ve since grown a huge love for anything baby pink. Sometimes I think I actually over do it on the pink with some outfits but fuck it haha. Because I’m not that body confident at the moment, there’s so many things I’m afraid to wear or that just don’t suit me. It’s a massive incentive to lose weight so that I can look more fab with my clothing choices.

    Alice xx

Leave Me A Comment!

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Follow Black Tulip on

Subscribe To Follow Black Tulip Beauty!

Join 3,346 other subscribers.

Sign Up To Our Mailing List & Newsletter!



Privacy Policy

%d bloggers like this: