The Stoma Series: Coming To Terms With A New Body!

7th November 2018

Hey everyone!

Another instalment of The Stoma Series today. I wanted to talk about ways I’m coming to terms with having my new body. I was hoping this may help someone in a similar situation or even just be an interesting read for people who don’t know too much about life post-op or with a stoma. Here are a few ways that have helped me to come to terms with my new body.

Accepting It For What It Is

Not just physically what it is but what it actually means for me and my life. Realising that you’re not offered a stoma if you don’t need one, especially someone of my age, made me realise that I did need one and that it would more than likely significantly improve my quality of life. My stoma nurse told me to try and not think of it as a foreign thing but as just a part of me that I’d never seen before, which is quite literally exactly what it is. It’s just a part of my insides brought to the surface. Everyone has a small intestine, just maybe not sticking out of their abdomen.

Asking All The Questions I Need To

I have new questions every week. About the stoma, the skin around it, the insides of it, the products I can use, my output, the size/shape of it, the list goes ON. Whenever I have a question, I can give one of the stoma nurses a call and they’re more than happy to answer everything I need or book me in as soon as possible if it’s something that needs to be sorted in person. They are absolutely wonderful, don’t hesitate to contact yours if you’re struggling with something!

Connecting With Others With A Stoma

This has been really important for my mental recovery. Knowing that there are people who have needed to or are going to have a stoma with the same worries and fears as me. But also knowing there are people who have had a stoma and are living a completely normal life post-surgery. It’s so important to focus on the positives and envision that happy end goal for yourself.

Connecting With Someone In The Same Health Position

Although I have connected to others with stomas, I’ve only actually spoken with one person who’s been in the same health situation as I have. There are a wealth of different reasons as to why people have to have a stoma. It’s been so lovely to talk to someone who’s had quite a similar health journey to me and at the same age, too.

Life with a stoma

Realising No One Notices The Stoma Unless You Tell Them

Can you tell I have a bag in any of these photos? Because if I wasn’t me, I’d have no idea. Obviously everyone who takes any notice of me on social media now knows that I have one but clearly I don’t care otherwise I wouldn’t share it. I was standing in the kitchen the other day wearing a pair of jeans and a t-shirt and my stepdad went, ‘Where’s your bag then?’. He seemed kind of baffled that he couldn’t see it at all.

Trying To Stop Comparing Myself

I don’t just mean to other people but to my pre-surgery self, too. Of course I’m not going to look the same, my body has been through hell with severe illness and I’ve been through major surgery with a more than likely permanent ileostomy. I try my best to look at my body as just an outer shell of myself, which is exactly what it is. My body doesn’t show my achievements, my relationships, my hard work, my intelligence, gratitude, loyalty or (slightly brutal) honesty. I can’t say I fully love my body but who can? I’m trying to care less instead.

Have you ever had to adapt to a huge health-related change in your life? How did you cope with it?

’Til Next Time,

8 responses to “The Stoma Series: Coming To Terms With A New Body!”

  1. You look AMAZING Alice, that night dress is beautiful on you!!!
    I had a feeding tube fitted around 8 years ago and I thought EVERYONE would notice and it’d ruin my life. 8 years on and I hardly notice it never mind other people!

    Liv x

  2. You look amazing girl x

  3. Ruth says:

    You look gorgeous, Alice!! And you’re absolutely right – you can’t tell at all. I’m glad you’ve been able to connect with others who are going through the same thing, particularly someone with a very similar journey to your own. I imagine that makes all the difference.

    You’re amazing.

  4. You’re so right, you would never know looking at the pictures because you look god damn gorgeous! I haven’t had any surgery but definitely have had to adapt my life around my leg tremble, I always worry how it looks when others around me see it happening, or when it’s going to happen, but like you said, you’ve just got to accept it isn’t who you are inside. Love this post Alice and know you’ll help so many people who are going through the same thing ❤️❤️

  5. Rebecca Allan says:

    Girl, I am so proud of you and how far you’ve come on your journey with your UC, surgery and stoma. You are one bad ass woman and you’re gorgeous. xo

  6. lifeofshar says:

    I have never really had to adapt to a huge health related change in my life but I did dread the day if it comes but not so much after reading this and keeping up with your journey, you have handled it so amazingly. Hate to admit that I didn’t know hardly anything about Stoma’s before reading about your experience and now I realise and notice that a lot more people opening talk about it than I thought and I think that it is so fab!! There is nothing wrong with asking questions. I look forward to reading more of this series. I already said on Instagram but you look so SEXY in those pictures, get it girrrrllll xxx

  7. I loved reading this Alice! It’s amazing that you can share your story and I’m positive it will help those in a similar position to you! Being more and more open about health is so important. You’re super inspiring and so strong – lots of love 🙂 xo

    Char |

  8. Alice says:

    Would you just LOOK at how incredible you look?! What the hell woman. I always love reading about your story and how far you’ve come, I could not be more bloody proud. Plus I have learnt so much about your illness and stomas from knowing you, it’s good to be in the know about these things as so many people have no idea. You definitely can’t tell at all that you’ve got a bag but obviously you rock it anyway x

    Alice //

Leave Me A Comment!

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Follow Black Tulip on

Subscribe To Follow Black Tulip Beauty!

Join 3,355 other subscribers.

Sign Up To Our Mailing List & Newsletter!



Privacy Policy

%d bloggers like this: